Venus, by sign and house, is your aesthetic. Actually, if you’re trying to rectify a natal chart, figuring out what house Venus is in is actually quite helpful. Just ask them (or yourself, or someone who knows them) “where does this person seek out beauty, and where do they put beauty out in the world?” If you have a birthday, and unless Venus is at the very, very end/very, very beginning of a sign, you know the sign and therefore the element. That’s not the same thing as a house, but understanding the sign and element helps to know the different between when and where Venus shines (house) as opposed to how (sign).

Fire signs:

Beauty in action, performance, or culture. This is a beauty that seeks to be appreciated, and these Venus placements are Instagram junkies. Strength, expression, power, creativity, and action are attractive to them, whether in body or mind. May find or create beauty in conflict (think Beatrice and Benedick), or in raw sexual expression. Tastes may be bolder, brighter, and more attention-getting, perhaps eve more overtly sexual and/or trendy.

Earth signs:

Physical beauty, of the body, of visual or tactile art, food, design, and music. Beauty in nature and beauty as signs of health or worldly success. Wants beauty that is also pleasing to the touch and taste. May tend toward the classic, safe, or architectural. May create beauty with their own two hands. This is appreciation of beauty for its own sake, shared or not, as vital to the human experience.

Air signs:

Beauty in rhythm, language, interaction, laughter, and youthfulness. This is beauty found everywhere, even in things others may not consider beautiful. Beauty in interaction, pleasure in relationships, social activities, and thought-provoking art. Light-hearted things, too, and things that are youthful. The tastes tend toward the eclectic, provocative, open, and fluid/flexible, as well as the cutting edge, whatever it is.

Water signs:

Beauty in emotional engagement, invoking memory, innocence, and flow. This is beauty that seeks an emotional reaction, whether that’s a positive or negative emotion. Beauty in romance, love, nostalgia, the aquatic. This aesthetic is the most sensitive to discordance in all things and prefers harmony and movement. The tastes tend toward the romantic, the sexual, the artsy (and perhaps even fartsy), and conventionally feminine.

I like things that aren’t represented by my Venus though.

I should hope so. Actually, you’re going to like stuff and derive pleasure from all kinds of things indicated by the planets and their locations in your birth chart. You just may not necessarily find it aesthetically pleasing.

For example, when I finally decide to sit still for a while and watch a film or television show, I prefer horror and thrillers. I like Texas Chainsaw Massacre. That’s as far from Venus in Capricorn in the 10th house as you can get, right?

But I don’t decorate like Ed Gein. I don’t have action figures of Leatherface or wear graphic t-shirts depicting him, either.

That’s because the mental stimulation I enjoy is a Mercury thing and movies are a Neptune thing. I like horror movies specifically because they’re not aesthetically pleasing to me and provide a complete departure from reality.

Your taste in music is Venusian.

Now, my taste in music, on the other hand, is pretty much Venus in Capricorn. I prefer “grown up” (old) music. I especially like jazz and standards — timeless stuff. I also like classic rock and oldies. While I can appreciate some modern pop, it’s just not rich enough for me.

Your Venus sign is likely indicative of the kind of music you like, and the position and strength of Venus indicative of how important music is to you.

I also like things in bed that aren’t represented by my Venus.

You’re conflating pleasure and sexual pleasure, and you’re forgetting about all the other things that come with sex besides the orgasm and the lead up to it. Venus says where you’d like to go on a date, what you need to feel appreciated and beautiful, and what is pleasing to the senses. It’s also indicative of what you think makes others feel that way, too. After all, if you like it, who doesn’t? You’ve cultivated this aesthetic and its what you have to offer the most.

Take a look at Venus in the cardinal signs:

Venus in Aries wants to go to the gym or a theme park and doesn’t have the patience to light 100 candles and make a trail of rose petals leading into the bedroom…but she will, if she knows there’s a sure-thing at the end of the trail and it won’t take forever to get there. Wants to literally wrestle, enjoys the chase but prefers to do the chasing. Has a sweet tooth for forbidden fruit and poison apples even more than Venus in Capricorn.

Yet, Venus in Capricorn wants a quiet night so she can check out your table manners and get to know you in a controlled condition to determine if you’re someone she can walk in the daylight with because you’re responsible and hard-working. If so, not even a kiss until you get back to her place…and once the doors are closed and locked, she jumps on you and doesn’t let go. Is even more lustful overall than Venus in Aries.

On the other hand, Venus in Libra wants to do what you want, hoping you’ll want what she wants, which is to make love, in at least 1000 cinematic ways. She’ll keep a few other potential and/or current lovers in her back pocket whom she hasn’t decided on quite yet, not that she wants you to know about the competition. Is more into PDA and being a social media couple than even Venus in Cancer.

Venus in Cancer wants to get married, to have a wedding, a storybook romance, and can’t separate sex from love. They want kisses in the rain, wine by the fireplace, to bake cookies together and eat them in a cottage in the country. They call you their boyfriend/girlfriend on the second date which is dinner with their family. Is even more conventionally romantic than Venus in Libra.

That’s Venus.

What you like in bed is an 8th house thing and a Mars thing. Your kinks are an 8th house thing, too. The ruler of the 8th house by sign and position gives a clue as to how (and with whom) you have sex with.

The 5th house shows the kind of people you’re attracted to, regardless of what you have to offer, and the ruler of the 5th house shows how you meet them. Ruler of the 5th house in the 7th house? You meet potential lovers when

they’re already attached. Ruler of the 5th house in the first house? They come to you.

I also don’t dress like my Venus.

Most people don’t unless they have Venus in the 1st or 2nd houses, or wear a Venusian uniform (6th house) or wear Venusian professional clothes (10th house). Even then, in most cultures, we don’t dress the same all the time.

Most people who can choose their own clothing tend to dress like their ascendant/first house, and often their 2nd house, according to what choice is available socially. You may really admire that Armani suit if you have Venus in the 10th house, but if you’re an Aquarius rising who has no need for that suit, you’re more likely choosing to wear graphic t-shirts of the way-cool obscure things you’re into when you have the choice.

Aesthetic and identity: we are what we like

In individualistic societies especially, we identify with what we like or prefer, what we find pleasing.

Freedom of religions means (or gives color to the idea) of preferring one god, one rite, one sect over all others.

Being vegetarian, pescatarian, vegan, paleo, carnivore, whatever, means preferring some food over another for reasons other than the fact that food is fuel.

And Venus, a personal planet, can show in part how we identify.

Being homosexual, bisexual, pansexual, hererosexual, asexual, etc. is identifying with the preference to have sex with people that look, feel, and smell a certain way and perhaps how one does not prefer others. [There’s no such thing as sapiosexuality, unless you’re just using a fancy name for your actual kink, which is simply to be pretentious without provocation.] Venus is one factor in who we fall in love with (regardless of sexual preference and irrespective of the great love we have for our own identities) because she shows how and when and why we are romantic and how we try to be attractive (yes, even for men).

Our professions are how we want to be seen in the world and how we attract recognition. Venus can tell us a lot about how we want to obtain the world’s good favor so it gives us money (also Venusian).

Venus is also class, as in, how do you prefer to get on with people? Do you prefer to smooth things over and maintain social connections, or do you “keep it real” by acting on impulse or by attracting even more attention to an unfortunate situation? Do you err on the side of kindness and affection instead because you can’t stand the idea of people not liking you? Or are you more diplomatic?

Venus is cosmetics (with Neptune and Pisces) and hairstyle (and Saturn and Capricorn). It’s also jewelry (Taurus) and luxury (with Leo and the Sun).

Gimme Gimme

Okay, here’s a quick way to tell someone’s Venus sign:

See what kind of gifts they like to receive. Like, actually like to receive, and not just say they like it because they want to be polite. Also, see what kind of gifts they give people when they don’t know what to give them.

Venus is pleasure and pleasurable things, and Venus likes to receive. Everyone likes gifts in some form, and giving is what we do to create and maintain relationships, whether its objects, time, service, attention, food, whatever.

Whatever makes someone’s eyes light up, even in spite of themselves, is a Venusian gift.

So it’s also no wonder that we consider Venus to represent in-born talents or gifts, too.