Recently, I had a dream that a fellow astrologer wanted me to join a media project to use astrology to predict the weather and establish patterns of climate change.

I said no, because there’s scientists who do a much better job of that, and why would you need astrology to predict the weather and establish patterns of climate change?

I recall that she gave at least two reasons. One reason was that people may want an alternative to meteorology and climatology to see how science is connected to spiritually. The second was to give people hope about climate change.

I refused – science isn’t connected to spirituality and no one should have hope over climate change. There is no need for an alternative to meteorology and climatology, much less coming from people who don’t really know much more than the average person about those areas of science. No one should be lulled into a false idea that they can good-vibe rising sea levels and global warming away, or that they can somehow harness the astrological energy to benefit in the end. People need to be scared of climate change so they will stop it, or at least stop interfering with the work of those who are trying to stop it.

That started an argument, and in the dream, I found out that even though I didn’t consent to being part of the project, my name was being used anyway, and I woke up with the fear, disappointment, and anxiety of having my name attached to something stupid and potentially destructive, all against my will. And then, as one does when one wakes from dreams, I realized that this wasn’t my reality, that I was still on an astrology break, and hopefully no one I knew was stupid enough to attempt such a redundant and misleading endeavor.

But that does bring me to a thing that keeps me on the outskirts of the astrology community, that I don’t want to pretend that astrology is something more than it is, that it is somehow a replacement for other things, or that it should be incorporated into things it has no business being a part of. Astrology isn’t a science, but that’s okay. It doesn’t need to be a science. But it is supposed to be a body of knowledge that those who know it share and generally agree on, but that’s not always the case anymore.

I mean, if you just look at Instagram, there’s so many straight up making shit up and calling it astrology, and the problem is testing it. When someone moronically says that say, Pisces rising is moody and has a bad temper because they personally have a bad temper, that’s not science. And also – Pisces rising doesn’t have a bad temper; rising signs have nothing to do with temper. That’s the Moon.

And I’m wondering if I should do something really not nice but necessary by culling these posts and then writing about them here, explaining why they’re bad astrology. But that’s also still doing astrology, and I’m not ready to come back just

I also understand that it’s very hard to make money saying things that make people uncomfortable. I could probably quit my day job and be a full time astrology if I was willing to join the merry masses trying to blow smoke up everyone’s ass these days.

Read any women’s magazine and follow those astrologers on social media, and you see that they are just blowing smoke up people’s asses because that’s what the editors want – no doom and gloom, all girl power, all the time, no force in nature is a match to will of a woman ages 18-36 in a Western country. People won’t read astrology articles about the Capricorn stellium of 2020 if the astrology says “stay home, save money, don’t quit your day job. This will be awesome if you’re already rich and at the top of the food chain, but terrible if you’re struggling and fledgling because Capricorn is about pecking orders and earning your place, not equality or even opportunity, so do. not. take. risks.” People who are still sitting around waiting for Jupiter conjunct Neptune to save us all from ourselves are really just demonstrating the giant (Jupiter) delusion (Neptune) of a cosmic hero to save us from ourselves (Pisces) that this conjunct is expanding on. There is no expanding of “consciousness,” because consciousness isn’t even a real thing. It’s an idea that some people have, and they can’t even agree on what it is. It’s a non-existent thing that lives in the imagination and the hopes of people who wish other people were more like them, because consciousness is really as individual as the individual, isn’t it? And Neptune is generational planet dealing with the collective.

Jupiter just expands what’s already there, and most people are not “spiritually awakened,” whatever the hell that actually means. Many people can’t be because they’re too busy putting food on the table and serving their masters to save their own lives. Many people can’t because they’re not on Earth to live in a rarefied headspace. Many people won’t because they’re supposed to be skeptics who teach us to question ourselves because we know damned well just how flawed the human mind is. Many people can’t because they’re too busy helping other people in real time with real things.

There’s more spiritual significance in sharing a piece of bread with someone than there is praying for them or sending good vibes or white light their way.

Science is not connected to spirituality, and it doesn’t need to be, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Science is a body of knowledge about the natural universe that is testable and falsifiable. Zoology isn’t tied to spirituality. Chemistry isn’t tied to spirituality. Genetically modified crops aren’t spiritual. Civil engineering isn’t spiritual. Even a scientific inquiry into paranormal phenomenon isn’t spiritual. None of it has to be spiritual because science is not democratic and does not need to cleave to the popular, non-scientific ideas of the masses as they exist now. The same reason that the law of evolution (also a theory, but also a law. Look it up) doesn’t require an “intelligent” designer or a god. It’s an explanation of natural phenomenon that is observable, testable, and falsifiable. It’s also the same reason why there is no need to wonder who Yahweh is angry with when natural disasters happen or terrible diseases hurt many people – geological phenomenon and virology both exist separately from spirituality.

And yes, you can predict the possibility of all these things happening by using astrology, but here’s the fun part:

Astrology need not be spiritual either, and by essence, it’s not. Astrology is a form of divination in which phenomena is explained by observations of the relative placement of celestial bodies in the sky about a particular place on Earth at a particular time. It need not be spiritual, or raise consciousness (again, whatever that means), or raise vibrations, or even be taken so personally that one mistakes world-wide phenomena as something they can personally harness the way a child may think she can control the wind by waving a stick at it. It’s fantastic to try, but the adult knows that the sorceress-in-training likely isn’t that powerful.

But even as an adult, it’s quite a seductive idea that you wave a natal chart at the universe and insist that it’s gonna make you rich and famous.

And it’s really no wonder that the wellness and woo communities have gone full Q-tard, embracing the most ridiculous of ideas – the instance that all things be intimately connected, both scientific thought and spiritual thought – is a peace out to reason in favor of a rugged individualism rooted in the idea that the mere human is somehow in control of the universe, and not the other way around.

Listen: no one is drinking Adrenochrome or whatever the fuck you think they’re doing. Why would they? What’s the scientific reason for that? And why get it from children when it can be manufactured cheaply and consistently? Keep in mind that not everyone in the world would rely on anecdotal evidence – there’s many of us who wouldn’t take a horse dewormer to fight a virus because that’s just not how it fucking works.

And the argument is usually “well how do YOU know? How does anyone know?” And here is the reason:

I’m smarter than that. There it is. I’m smarter than that. I have a terminal degree, I know how to do actual research, not sitting-on-the-toilet-watching-Youtube research, I know how to learn about complicated things and find the sources of information that are reliable, and I know how to read pretty complex stuff. I can read case law, I can read statutes, I can read law journal articles, and I can also read scientific papers. But moreover, I’m able to tell the difference between sources. Food Babe is a moron who apparently can’t read at a 12th grade level: I pronounce every single chemical I read on a label, so I guess I can eat anything I want. I also know how to look them up to see where they come from, what they do, and what that means to me. I also have some (scant) experience working in food production that let me know that “organic” doesn’t necessarily mean “sterile” or “not dangerous.” The only answer no one can argue with is that the reasons are “spiritual,” because there is no scientific explanation for why say, refusing to get vaccinated is not spiritual, or why thinking organic fruits and vegetables are more “spiritual” than gmos.

But maybe it’s time to stop acting like spiritual beliefs aren’t up to scrutiny. After all, the First Amendment right to freedom of religions doesn’t mean that other people can’t question your beliefs. It’s like when some asshole is walking around the grocery store with a snarling Rottweiler on a prong collar yelling “it’s a service dog!” as if we’re just supposed to believe that. Likewise, if someone has a supposedly spiritual belief that they use excuse their asshole behavior, we should be more comfortable calling bullshit on those spiritual beliefs.

Also, in case you’re wondering: it’s perfectly legal to walk up to a shithead with an animal that’s obviously not a service dog and question if that animal is actually a service dog if you’re just another customer. If they tell you that you don’t have the right to question them, laugh in their face. The store owner can’t ask that, but you can because you don’t have the power to deny them access to the store. Also, on that note: the ADA requires that disabled bathroom stalls and doors be available in public buildings, not that they be for the exclusive use of disabled people only. Go ahead and use the big stall if you need to.

But science need not be connected to spirituality. It’s not important to either the advancement of science or spirituality. Not everything has to be connected in our conscious minds all the time, and many things can exist at once without a unifying theory if you can be comfortable with that. Westerners struggle with this idea because of the God-rules-all indoctrination from Christianity that permeates everything like the stench of stale cigarettes, but it’s entirely possible to not need everything to have a single master who made it all. Yes, there is a connection to you and everyone else at the very least because we share so much of the same genome, and we may very well only be separated from each other by six degrees, but if someone were to ask me if I was related to Barack Obama, the answer is no, because I know they mean “close blood relative” and not “members of the same species” or “members of the same profession.” And there is no reason we need to identify as cousins. He will still be my one of my favorite presidents (unless Michelle runs in 2028, and in that case, she may outrank him in that hierarchy) regardless.

And maybe one day there will be a scientific explanation for astrological phenomena that is based in empirical evidence from nature and not merely on the psychological reasons for belief, but until that time, let’s not pretend one exists if it’s not necessarily. At the very least, isn’t it great how the fact that now that astrology is considered a girl’s thing, men seem to be so upset by it? For centuries, in all cultures, it was dominated by men, and even modern astrology starting in the early 20th century (we are post modern now) had a few female stars, but it was still largely dominated by men. And now it isn’t anymore. I mean, imagine the American white male who has never really had to think of himself as existing within biological and sociological borders that limit him having to contend with a woman who appeals to the universe to explain why the man does in fact, have boundaries and limits? For the person of color and for the woman, it’s not that big of a psychological step because they live in a culture that constantly tells them who they are and what they are in comparison to whiteness and in comparison to conventional maleness. The idea that beyond this great societal fiction are the actual parameters that not only explain their flaws but more importantly, their potential regardless of the time, place, and socioeconomic circumstances of their birth, and that it’s so far above everyone that men can’t control it.

It would be maddening, wouldn’t it?

So please understand that I am still an astrologer, even if I’m not doing this publicly right now, because I have a belief that is stronger than any other belief I have, and I am accustom to the belief that every man, woman, and child is a star, and like the stars in the sky, they are endless and eternal, and no two stars shall dim each other, but shine with their own light. And I don’t have a plausible scientific explanation for the patterns I can read in a chart because I can’t tell you what phenomena makes both a person like this and a planet appear to be like this, too, over and over again, and I can’t pretend to know.

But that doesn’t matter to me. I don’t need to justify it by diluting it by getting in bed with the paranoid and scattered or by trying to pretend it’s something it’s not.

And yes, you actually can use astrology to predict weather patterns, even climate change if you are so inclined. The problem is that long-term forecasting in astrology in the 21st century is just full of too much baseless optimism and too much magical thinking because so much astrology nowadays is just too much baseless optimism and too much magical thinking, and it comes down to two things that are really rather new phenomenon when it comes to astrology:

The shameless capitalism of post modern astrology and the shameless bid for social media attention regardless of whether it flows into the shameless capitalism.

There’s a reason Baba Yaga’s hut is in the forest, with feet, and turned toward the forest: the occult is still the occult, and I am still an occult practitioner, and the astrology I practice is occult, not for social media: you have to come to the forest, and I have to turn around. I know a number of people like that, practitioners of their crafts and arts who aren’t social media darlings, but they are the real deal.

And astrology is not a savior that we will magically find in ourselves if that savior is not willing to roll up his or her sleeves and do work. You can live and die never knowing what your birth chart looks like and do tremendous things because humans are always capable of amazing stuff. We have amazing brains. We have done amazing things entirely by ourselves, with no help from aliens, gods, or even starseeds. Maybe you believe in them, but I’m pretty sure our really cool meat-fed cerebrums would have figured out a lot of stuff eventually. I mean, it’s entirely possible for humans to have figured out how to have made the pyramids or giant mounds. Have you ever watched a toddler play with blocks? They actually intuit statics pretty well. And if you consider that for most of human history, humans were intimately connected to the geography, their structures, the landscape, it’s not weird to think they would eventually figure out how to cleave stone, drag stone, hoist stone, and set stone using what they have observed and taught each other over the generations. Sure, for the average joe sitting behind a computer all day, the idea of building your own stone dome in real life with his own hands would seem impossible without major equipment, cement, and a whole crew, but for the ancient man who spend his entire life building and rebuilding structures, learning from a very early age how to set and balance the rocks, how to mix the ash into the clay to make the cement, and how to work as a team to build the structure and keep it up, it’s just part of daily life. He would totally find your computer and Cheez-Its weird though.

And right now, I’m sitting on the sidelines building stone domes in my life, getting back to basics, studying the astrology without any concern as to how I’m going to repackage it and sell it, just like I used to do for about fifteen years before I hung up a shingle. Back then, it wasn’t popular and everyone thought you were crazy or wanted to argue with you about it. I don’t think I miss those days, but I do miss the occult part of the occult and not because I want astrology to be for a selective few, but because I want the good stuff to outshine the bullshit.

And I don’t have the time or energy right now to compete with the bullshit. It makes me have to stay inside all day while these increasingly warm days of spring pass me by, and I have a purpose and a destiny too, and it may sound crazy, but I already spent previous lifetimes in many spiritual practices, from the religious to the out-there, and I suffered for it, and I became enlightened in some manner. I learned something that I’m now supposed to share, something important that drives me to break karmic ties with those religious communities, the crabs in the bucket, and forging into a new cycle, and what I learned in those lifetimes was this:

Heaven is built with your own two hands.

Not your personal heaven: everyone’s heaven, by every pair of hands, literally.

And that is a gift reserved for us that even the angels were not given, for they were given no hands.